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Posts Tagged ‘Dungeon Seige

Review: In The Name of the King, or “Jason Statham Got to Get Paid, Son.” (Or more “Boll Crap”)

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'So Claire, have you made anything since Meet Joe Black?'

Newer Update: The numbers are in, ITNOTK:ADST (That’s awesome. That’s like 10 words in the title) made 3 mil opening weekend, and Fox finally admits how bad of a director Uwe Boll is. Now, now, I can rest in peace.

Update: /Film is reporting that In the Name of the King opened up with $950k on opening day, and is headed for a $2.1m opening weekend.

There are some people which are far more courageous than I, and one of those is our very own intrepid J-RAD, who braved his way the theatre to slog through Uwe Boll’s latest star-studded craptravaganza, In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Seige Tale. Here it goes:

With critical acclaims going to comedies like “Juno” and “Superbad,” I’d like to highlight another film that is easily this year’s unexpected comedy breakthrough: “In The Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale.” Unfortunately for director Uwe Boll, it’s supposed to be an Action/Adventure/Fantasy flick — herein lies the humor. The film’s protagonist (who is a farmer) is unimaginatively named Farmer; the outright theft of shots from the Lord of the Rings trilogy begs one to wonder if Uwe Boll actually storyboarded anything, or if he just referred to one seriously worn-out copy of Jackson’s opus; and the film’s dialogue seems to have been randomly typed by a group of one-armed kinkajous with Tourette’s Syndrome that had been sniffing drain cleaner.

But I digress.

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Written by canasian

January 12, 2008 at 1:21 pm