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Archive for the ‘Film Reviews’ Category

Stuff You Should Watch: Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog (Webisodes)

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Doogie Howser just got a whole load scarier. And awesomer.

Update!: Watch it all right here right now!

That’s Neil Patrick Harris dressed up as a mad scientist supervillain singing a song in a Joss Whedon (creator of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Firefly, Serenity and the upcoming FOX series Dollhouse) written and directed free web series. Did I just die and go to nerd heaven? I think I did. If you’re not already there now (the website, not nerd heaven), you should watch Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog and then come back and read why you did what you just did.

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Written by canasian

July 17, 2008 at 10:10 am

Review: Hellboy II: The Golden Army of Awesomeness that is Awesome

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Looks like a photo from my family reunion. I would be the squinty one.

Okay, in the interest of full disclosure, this blogger has not yet had the opportunity to see Pan’s Labyrinth (aka Guillermo Del Toro finally becomes liked by people other than complete nerds). That being said, onto the review.

I am a child of the eighties. And early nineties. That means Ninja Turtles, Fraggle Rock, He-Man, Really Bad He Man Movie, G.I. Joe, Transformers, Dino Riders (oh for the love, Dino Riders!), Never Ending Story, Willow, Star Wars, Indiana Jones and David Bowie creeping the living bejeebers out of me in Labyrinth. I am a child of the era of pure imagination. This was before the airwaves were desecrated by reality TV and other programming that catered to the lowest common denominator. This was a time where we didn’t need drugs as kids because all the people making TV and Movies were taking them for us.

This is what Hellboy was like.

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Written by canasian

July 14, 2008 at 11:43 pm

Review: In The Name of the King, or “Jason Statham Got to Get Paid, Son.” (Or more “Boll Crap”)

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'So Claire, have you made anything since Meet Joe Black?'

Newer Update: The numbers are in, ITNOTK:ADST (That’s awesome. That’s like 10 words in the title) made 3 mil opening weekend, and Fox finally admits how bad of a director Uwe Boll is. Now, now, I can rest in peace.

Update: /Film is reporting that In the Name of the King opened up with $950k on opening day, and is headed for a $2.1m opening weekend.

There are some people which are far more courageous than I, and one of those is our very own intrepid J-RAD, who braved his way the theatre to slog through Uwe Boll’s latest star-studded craptravaganza, In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Seige Tale. Here it goes:

With critical acclaims going to comedies like “Juno” and “Superbad,” I’d like to highlight another film that is easily this year’s unexpected comedy breakthrough: “In The Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale.” Unfortunately for director Uwe Boll, it’s supposed to be an Action/Adventure/Fantasy flick — herein lies the humor. The film’s protagonist (who is a farmer) is unimaginatively named Farmer; the outright theft of shots from the Lord of the Rings trilogy begs one to wonder if Uwe Boll actually storyboarded anything, or if he just referred to one seriously worn-out copy of Jackson’s opus; and the film’s dialogue seems to have been randomly typed by a group of one-armed kinkajous with Tourette’s Syndrome that had been sniffing drain cleaner.

But I digress.

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Written by canasian

January 12, 2008 at 1:21 pm

Review: National Treasure 2: Nicholas Cage Still Refuses to Get His Hair Cut

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Wow, it really is from IKEA.
Dang, it IS by IKEA. The Swedes! The SWEDES!

Does Nic Cage even act anymore? I remember when he was always all, Oscar hopeful and stuff… but now he seems content to simply solve Encyclopedia Brownian-type mysteries and look a lot like Neil Diamond (Reference). However, all kidding aside, he returns to us in the hugely successful sequel to the hugely successful National Treasure. This time involving, a secretive Book of Secrets.

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Written by canasian

January 9, 2008 at 6:44 pm