Canasian & Friends v2.0

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Review: National Treasure 2: Nicholas Cage Still Refuses to Get His Hair Cut

with 4 comments

Wow, it really is from IKEA.
Dang, it IS by IKEA. The Swedes! The SWEDES!

Does Nic Cage even act anymore? I remember when he was always all, Oscar hopeful and stuff… but now he seems content to simply solve Encyclopedia Brownian-type mysteries and look a lot like Neil Diamond (Reference). However, all kidding aside, he returns to us in the hugely successful sequel to the hugely successful National Treasure. This time involving, a secretive Book of Secrets.

The film starts off at a collegiate symposium in which Benjamin Gates (Cage) and his father Patrick (a bunny-stunned Jon Voight) conclude that Ben’s great-great-grandfather was a civil war hero in preventing a secretive society from translating a treasure map that would have financed the Confederacy’s eventual victory over the Union. It’s here where I got perhaps what was the best overall view of what the rest of the film would hold. It moved very very quickly, made sure I was just confused enough about who I should be invested in to ever be able to get my footing, and lots and lots of crappy crappy dialogue. Honestly, I swear, “And in conclusion, Thomas Gates was a great American hero. Thank you.” <applause> <cue snazzy power-point in the background>

Then suddenly, suddenly, Ed Harris is there and says he has a page of evidence from the diary of John Wilkes Booth that says that Nic’s great-great-grand pappy was in fact the mastermind behind the Lincoln assassination! <gasp> Sorry Nic, the page is real, you’re going to have to prove is innocence because this is going on the front page of every national newspaper tomorrow morning and your name will be tarnished forever.

“Well this right here says that yo momma’s a fatty.”

So how else do you prove your ancestor’s innocence? <suspend disbelief> I know, find the obviously impossible to find treasure, oh and if you can do it in a day or two, we’ll take that too.

Enter everyone that was in the last movie (the lovely Diane Kruger as the angry Abigail, the comedic timing challenged Justin Bartha as Riley ‘Gizmodo’ Poole, Harvey ‘Sea Dawg’ Keitel) and one or two newcomers (President Bruce Greenwood and Oscar winner Helen Mirren), and you got youself a stew goin’!

“But then I couldn’t because the rocks were too realistic looking”

So here’s the thing. With three Oscar winners in this film (Voight, Mirren and Cage) and one person who has been nominated for four Oscars (Harris) you’d expect something much much greater than this, but the speedy but challenged script doesn’t really lend itself to too much character work. Honestly, the best thing about this film is Bruce Greenwood. He’s the only one who doesn’t look like he’s trying to keep up (Kruger and Bartha) or is just sleepwalking through this thing for a paycheck (everyone else).

“I’m a better actor than you. Much better.” “But I’m Ghost Rider!”

But despite it’s pitfalls (no pun intended), NT2:BOS (hmm…looks like chemistry class) proves to be a fun and entertaining popcorn flick. Director Jon Turtletaub keeps everything moving along fast enough for people to not have enough time to think about some of the (ill)logical jumps that the script makes. The action is fun and creative and the mystery is intriguing enough. Even though the actors aren’t asked to give their all, nobody is actually really bad (heads up, there’s a swear word after the jump). Really, I think we’re primed and ready for a solid action/adventure movie and these National Treasure movies aren’t bad appetizers. The main course is coming this ladies and gents, and he wears a fedora and carries a whip.

The verdict: 6/10


Written by canasian

January 9, 2008 at 6:44 pm

4 Responses

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  1. Meh. Cage is a dime-store Indiana Jones.

    The best part was the Goofy how-to short at the beginning. Wonderful!


    January 16, 2008 at 12:19 am

  2. Or a nickelcade Indiana Jones.


    January 17, 2008 at 9:40 am

  3. In response to the hair…. I think Nic Cage falls in line with the many bald men who have passed through the eons of time before him and have been unable to come to grips with it. “Maybe if I just grow out the other parts it will be OK…” WRONG, that forehead just keeps growin. Just accept the inevitable. I love Nic Cage , but he’s got to cut that junk.


    February 10, 2008 at 1:23 am

  4. kheili mardi nicolas

    آریا آقائی

    February 4, 2009 at 1:59 pm

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